Do-It-Yourself Family by Eric Stromer

Author:Eric Stromer [Stromer, Eric]
Language: eng
Format: epub, pdf
ISBN: 978-0-307-48392-8
Publisher: Random House Publishing Group
Published: 2009-01-20T16:00:00+00:00

ERIC’S FIVE BEST IDEAS FOR ROMANCE

My middle name is Romance. Actually it’s Antony, but in Austria that means “man with ideas on how to make your master bedroom a place to rekindle that spark of passion that first attracted you to that person sleeping next to you that you can finally see because your kids are now sleeping in their own beds,” but said with a thick, Schwarzeneggerian accent.

I say it’s time to take back the bedroom! Get ’em out and get their stuff out, too. Reclaim your space and honor your relationship again. There are several tips that work wonders for the relationship. I know—I did it and shortly thereafter my wife gave birth to our second son. But I still know, O.K.? Back off! Here are my five best recipes for Master Bedroom Romance.

1. Picture your romance. Only hang pictures from your romance as a couple; make it your room, not theirs. Again, this is your space for your time together. Your kids will feel much better about themselves if they see you hugging your spouse because you want to, not because you should. Kids would much rather see you get along than see a bunch of pictures of themselves in your room.

2. Channel your own reality. Make the TV disappear, either behind closed doors or in another room. I make my living on TV, but that doesn’t mean the TV should become a replacement for intimacy. Nor should it become a design feature. The TV (even the look of it) is distracting and numbing to the senses. It can sometimes make you check out and become unavailable. If you must have the TV in the bedroom, make sure that you guys are both in agreement that you don’t want to talk or relate to each other. Sometimes there is nothing better than cozying up with your spouse and kids and watching a great movie. Or one of my TV shows. And if you do not care to hide or move the TV, consider one of many DVDs that can turn your TV into an art or photo display. When not in use as a TV, the screen will show a beautiful painting by Monet or some great photo of you guys as a couple.

3. Struck by lighting. Replace light switches with dimmers. Mood lighting is key. It can make all the difference in how we perceive each other. Alternative lighting sources such as candles and lanterns are also great choices. Creating a peaceful and romantic mood invites communication and intimacy. What better way to spend a quiet spa-like evening with someone you created so much life with? As my mentor for romance, the incomparable soul singer Teddy Pendergrass said, “Turn out the lights, light a candle.” Boom! Two kids later, here I am! It works, thanks to lighting.

4. Cozy blankets. Build or buy a trunk for the foot of the bed and use it for cozy throw blanket storage—she’s always cold, he’s always warm. The combo = hot! Yikes! There is nothing better than a little late-afternoon nap under a cozy blanket for two.

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